Bigger on the inside

Not long ago a stranger stopped me and my boys in the park and felt the need to tell me how lucky I should feel to have healthy kids. I smiled and agreed graciously but as I walked away I found myself frustrated. Yes I feel so blessed to have my boys and thankful that they are not where they were. The frustration came with the fact that this lady had no idea how many sleepless nights we have or what a struggle it is to keep our twins growing. She doesn't know that every calorie must be counted, or every bite calculated meticulously. It's not her fault, we fight a seemingly invisible disease. Unless you know them you would never know that they are sick. The Lord used this to open my eyes a little. How many people do I see daily and I have no idea what they are fighting? How easily do I judge a situation without knowing the full situation? I bet I do it every single day. So this coming year I am going to pause and offer grace first, I am going to pray more and speak less, offering the smell consideration I would want for myself. Not unlike the TARDIS some things are bigger on the inside

She has a name!!!!

In October 2015 I called our local crisis pregnancy center and asked "if a mom wanted to save her baby from abortion through adoption, what would you tell her." They gave us the name of a local Christian based adoption agency that works with both foster care and pregnant mamas, I knew this would be the best place for us to start. Over the course of the next year and a half, we jumped through hoops and prayed, prepared our home, and prayed, said good bye to a placement that we thought would be ours forever, (cried) and prayed. At Christmas 2016 we got a call that would change many lives, a birth family had chosen us to adopt their baby. (More crying) And today, we anxiously pray for the safe delivery of Mia Joy. Mia means wanted child, for the rest of her life she will know that she is wanted. Wanted by a mom and dad and brothers that loved her deeply but couldn't keep her. Wanted by adoptive mom and dad and brothers that had moved mountains and waited and prayed relentlessly for her. And above all Wanted by a Heavenly Father that knew her before she was born, and gave her to a family that could love her completely and relentlessly. The Lord gave us the name Joy when we began this journey, obviously We didn't know what it would look like or how our family would change as we waited, but Joy isn't happiness, it isn't dependent on circumstances or situations, Joy is constant even amidst sufferings and hard times. Our prayer for her is that she would always be surrounded by a heavenly Joy, not tossed back and forth by circumstance but consistent and foundational. And that she would always feel wanted and loved!

Waiting for Joy

We are waiting for Joy As many of our family and friends know, we are waiting for Joy. We are petitioning heaven for a chance to see God, but not in the way you might think. In October 2015 God began to speak to both Colin and I about abortion in America. Planned parenthood was in the news and everyone was talking about the millions of lives lost to this selfish act. But what could we do? As the Lord began to speak in the still quiet moments we had our answer. James 1:27 “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” How could we expect woman to choose life if they have no one to give their baby to? But we didn't stop there. We did research and found out that if each church just did a little, we could literally change the face of foster care in America. Our desire is to be the example for the bride of Christ. We can't expect others to open their homes or their wallets without doing so ourselves. So as we pray and thank the Lord for the little girl who we call Joy. We pray for her safety until she is home where she belongs. We pray that she feels loved and protected until her (very excited) older brothers can protect her ( and torment her)

2 and a half years

Today the twins are two and a half. That means 913 days of having them in our family. It has been a crazy, exciting, stressful 913 days. we have conquered walking and talking and sleeping through the night. We have fought tirelessly to beat rumors of failure to thrive, food allergies, and even Cystic Fibrosis. After countless tests, the fabulous Drs at Spokane Pediatric Gastroenterology diagnosed The twins with Gastroparesis. 

What Is Gastroparesis?

 A condition that affects the stomach muscles and prevents proper stomach emptying

People may experience:

Pain: in the abdomen or upper abdomen

Gastrointestinal: vomiting, heartburn, belching, indigestion, bloating, or regurgitation

Whole body: dehydration, malnutrition, loss of appetite, or nausea, and extreme weight loss 

Sources: Mayo Clinic and others.

After months and months of medications and attempts at weight gain, we now know five ways to not cure gastroparesis. Don't worry, we serve a really great God, and believe without a doubt He is completely in control. 

We spent a few days this week at Seattle Children's Hospital meeting with an amazing doctor who assured us that there is hope. Our next move is to increase the dosage for the twins' medications and use them all at the same time instead of individually. The goal for the next three months is that both twins gain weight, or at the very least maintain. If we can gain even an ounce we can avoid the looming " feeding tube" discussion.

 Such goofy boys 

Today we celebrate every little milestone and try our best to enjoy the hard days with the good ones. Parenting these boys is a gift. 

A Bath a Day Keeps the Dr. Away

Almost every time I venture out of my house, with my four little monkeys in tow, I get comments like " wow you have your hands full, I don't know how you do it" or " I could never handle more than my one two year old." Or my favorite,( please insert sarcastic tone) " were they having a 2 for the price of one sale at Costco." My answer is often a patient, "nope I did this on purpose" or " It's a learned skill". To me parenting is a honor, children are a gift from heaven. The bible says in James 1:17 that every good and perfect gift is from The Lord. I personally have several amazing woman in my life that have prayed and prayed for such an honor and were only allowed to love their babies for a short time before they were taken too soon.

That being said, it's hard work keeping 4 active boys alive and ending my day with even a shred of sanity. This is where a bath a day comes in. After the babies are tucked into their cribs, my husband ( totally a super hero if you ask me) grants me uninterrupted mom time. I sneak into a hot bubbly tub and embrace the sounds of daddy reading stories and speaking life into our little men as he tucks them into bed. No every night is this picture perfect. Some nights I have to sink my head into the water to drown out the bickering and complaining. I take comfort in knowing that I'm off duty until they are in bed. I spend my time relaxing, gaining perspective and allowing The Lord to speak to my heart. As the warm water soothes my tired feet and sore back, my heart is refreshed and ready for another day of being nurse, mommy, and maid to four little tornadoes of questions and complaints and even the occasional hug.  

We Don't eat lunch

It's confession time. I'm the mom that has coffee for breakfast, Dr. Pepper for lunch and then we eat dinner as a family. This lifestyle has it's advantages, one being that my pants fit great! However there is a few big disadvantages, the biggest being that I don't model healthy behavior for my children. This new year our family, like many other American families is taking advantage of the fresh start and trying to create a new healthy lifestyle for our family. First of all we try to exercise with our kids. It is so fun watching my little boys show me their leg lifts and push ups that they learned from daddy. As well as exercise we have started a new healthy eating plan. We eat a big full breakfast together. And the rest of the day, everyone eats when they are hungry. I am sure your thinking, how is this different from what we already do? Instead of me creating delicious full meals for lunch And dinner that my kids won't eat, producing the great food fight that anyone with toddlers has encountered. they get to chose anything they want from their basket in the fridge " the Monkey bin". 

The basket is usually full of a wide variety of healthy options. And the options change everyday. They only get to have one of each snack per day (so they don't go crazy and eat 6 yogurts)

 Items that can't be in the refrigerator or that need prepared are pictured and placed in the bin.

Our goal in creating the "monkey bin" is to eliminate the constant food fight, create healthy eating habits so they are eating tons of small meals and hopefully creating a lifestyle of healthy snacking.

Here are a few ideas to get you thinking about your own food bins 

Fresh fruit

Fresh veggies

Chips and bean dip

Wheat thins and hummus

Greek yogurt

Nuts and trail mixes

Peanut butter filled pretzels

Cheese sticks

Granola bars

Pepperoni

Chicken breast cut into sticks for dipping

Whole wheat bagels with peanut butter

Cracker sandwiches ( cheese, meat, crackers)

Baked potatoes

Baked corn dogs

Breakfast cookies

I'm sure you can thing of many more options for your picky eaters

A huge responsibility

Raising boys is a lot of work and a lot of fun. As a young mom I watch my boys play and learn and I do my best to teach them. I teach them so that they will one day be responsible contributing members of society, Godly husbands, and loving fathers. I teach them to love the Lord, honor people and respect themselves. Recently the weight of this job has become much more evident. The Spokane city council has ruled that it is not against the law to be nearly naked in public. Things such as Topless Tuesday are becoming more and more common in our country and it's not uncommon for my sons to see topless woman smoking outside a coffee stand as I sit at a red light.  Children are being desensitized to things that were once protected and sacred. This realization is heavy on me today. I know that I can not shelter my sons from the world. New " Common Core" practices will be introducing our children to explicit material while they are still learning simple division. James 1:5 says that if we lack wisdom we should ask and the Lord and He will give it. well Lord, please give us wisdom to raise men with a godly view of themselves and their generation.